April 28, 2013

• marriage, love, random

  i don't remember if i posted about the eatyourkimchi interview but their love is so awesome. even though i don't subscribe to channels (lol)

  i don't believe in first site but in love after becoming friends. i still haven't been in love yet. i feel like that comes after years and years of being together. getting past the point of just physical attraction. past the point of lust. sure, attraction and sexual interactions are hugely important--but you know if you love someone when you can have moments enjoying their presence, outside of that. when you can give, take, give, take back and forth. and that you want to do it, you want them to make them happy. of course that would come back in return 100 times.

  guess I've figured that stuff out. i don't think i'd want to have a bunch of physical encounters all the time (down the line)... it just doesn't have meaning if you're not both in it for the same reasons.

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  so, what do you want out of a relationship? I feel like, I want to share my life with someone and have experiences. friends are friends, lovers are lovers. i want to share the differences in my life and to know about their differences too. I want to share stories, and places, and make new memories with them. I want to spent my whole life to get to know them and make more memories and see how we change together. 

  I still don't know if I want marriage as a title yet. there's a lot of things unsettled that I need to talk to my parents about on a serious note that I never thought I'd actually do.

  There are things to discuss with people in my past and my present while trying to figure out things in life. Good thing I'm getting a good chunk of these things squared out while in my 20's . 

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  Perfect marriages. Perfect lives.

   It can exist if the puzzle is put together at the right times. When is the right time for me? I guess I'll know when I figure it out.

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  other thoughts..

  One mature thing I would like to do and change is to not belittle people. Try to look down on them or judge too easily. It's hard, but people are people. They have different circumstances. They got that way cuz of a reason and ya know what? If you gave them your time, they'd probably give you time and maybe even change. You don't have to give all your time but sometimes a couple of minutes might be just enough. It's crazy how the world works like that. You do something wrong and it changes another person's life. 

  iono, ranting.

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  anyway, here's a vid of Sandara, lol.

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUXrX8iWEPY&NR=1&feature=endscreen

  i  think i posted about this but woahz, their lives. 

  I honestly think that yeah, she works hard, but that also YG is a businessman. she's pretty, knows like 3 languages and can leverage different markets. ;D. all by being just her.

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  How do you want to live your life? I've always wanted to do the right thing. There were times where I felt like I didn't. That I acted out of emotion. But the thing is, even if I did wrong, even if it was the wrong time or that it was too early, I will live to die knowing I did things with honesty. That I did what I could to keep things real. That I tried to make sure that I wasn't just giving feelings when they weren't real. That I spoke words i didn't mean. I want to be honest. There are times where I don't give the whole truth at the right time. . I work that way. But I still feel guilty and end up telling cuz I want to keep the trust. I can't just lie about everything (though it's quite easy to lie). 

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  I read about the culture of music business a while back (or videos) and it said that many stars that preach good morals don't follow them behind the scenes. wtf. what kind of role model is that? they truly are selling an image. what a bunch of sh*t. the real world is painted gray with different points highlighted like crazzzyyyyy.

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  fingertips on the keyboard,
  your message pops up on my phone

  no hesitation hits,
  i respond with two clicks

  unlocked and typing,

  words magically flow amongst one another

  i let out a sigh,

  and gaze back at the computer screen

  we aren't what we used to be,

  i don't want it to be what it used to be

  if i want you forever,

  we'll have to change a little every second

  for now we'll be friends,

  and see how it all ends

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  • 10:41 pm
  • 1 Comment